I really didn't mind pregnancy, but still I'm finding little things every day that make me thankful it's over. For example:
Now I can lean over the bathroom counter and get a much better angle at doing my mascara.
Now I can sleep on my stomach or even my back if I want to!
Now I can shave my legs and paint my toenails.
Now I can use a napkin on my lap. Because now I have a lap!
Now I can make it for more than 15 minutes (and even overnight!) without having to use the bathroom.
Now I can bend over.
Now I can walk much faster without any discomfort!
And now I have met my wonderful son and get to enjoy him every day. What a blessing.
9.06.2011
Back to "Normal"?
Everyone says that with the baby, we'll find a "new normal." This is true. Things are different now and we've been dealing with a huge adjustment in these first couple of weeks. Perfectly timed, my husband and I had the privilege of a date night this weekend. Will is only 2 1/2 weeks old, but his four loving grandparents volunteered to take care of him and let Alex and me go out. In preparation for the occasion, I tried on my pre-pregnancy jeans...and they fit! I couldn't believe it. They were snug, but they fit. That motivated me to put on a little extra make up and pull out some fun jewelry. I felt like the old "me"!
Leaving Will wasn't as hard as I thought it might be. It felt strange to leave Will (he has hardly been out of my sight since he was born!). But as soon as Alex and I got into his car, it felt like old times. It felt "normal"--just us. We had a great night at dinner and hardly talked about the baby. We allowed ourselves to just enjoy being out together and not worry about what's going on at home.
Of course our idea of normal will change as Will becomes more and more a part of our lives and activities. Soon it will feel "normal" to be all together with Will and it will feel abnormal to be out alone. So I guess we're still in transition, still adjusting. All I know is that I can't wait to be back in my normal wardrobe!
Leaving Will wasn't as hard as I thought it might be. It felt strange to leave Will (he has hardly been out of my sight since he was born!). But as soon as Alex and I got into his car, it felt like old times. It felt "normal"--just us. We had a great night at dinner and hardly talked about the baby. We allowed ourselves to just enjoy being out together and not worry about what's going on at home.
Of course our idea of normal will change as Will becomes more and more a part of our lives and activities. Soon it will feel "normal" to be all together with Will and it will feel abnormal to be out alone. So I guess we're still in transition, still adjusting. All I know is that I can't wait to be back in my normal wardrobe!
9.02.2011
You'll Never Know
On one of my lullaby albums is the song "You Are My Sunshine." It had been a long time since I heard that one. I started to sing along and heard the words in a new way: "You'll never know, dear, how much I love you...." I immediately thought of an email my dad sent me last week where he was commenting on my new role as a mom and wrote: "Now you know how much Mom and I love you."
It's true! I know love. I love my parents and siblings, I love my husband, but I never understood that love that a parent has for a child until I had my own. So, Will, remember that you'll never know how much I love you...until some day you have the honor of becoming a dad yourself!
It's true! I know love. I love my parents and siblings, I love my husband, but I never understood that love that a parent has for a child until I had my own. So, Will, remember that you'll never know how much I love you...until some day you have the honor of becoming a dad yourself!
8.30.2011
That's Motherhood
My little boy is two weeks old today. It's been a total blur! Before my mother left last Thursday, I was physically feeling so much better, but still crying uncontrollably. As I'd been relying on my mother's expertise to coach me through all the other aches and pains, I also asked her about this: "When will the crying stop?" She welled up with tears herself and said, "It never stops. That's motherhood. There will be moments when you feel so much love that your chest can't hold your heart."
Even today (and I'm admittedly sleep deprived), I'm holding my baby boy and rocking him to sleep and the tears come again. I just feel so much love that my chest can't hold my heart. I just want to freeze this moment in time and revisit it whenever I want. There is nothing better than cuddling a sleeping baby, my son, hearing his breathing while he is calmed by my heartbeat. It's so hard late at night when all I want to do is put him to bed so that I can also get some sleep! But too soon these days will be gone. I want to soak up every minute.
I cry less now, and they are happy tears, but I don't expect them to ever disappear. That's motherhood.
Even today (and I'm admittedly sleep deprived), I'm holding my baby boy and rocking him to sleep and the tears come again. I just feel so much love that my chest can't hold my heart. I just want to freeze this moment in time and revisit it whenever I want. There is nothing better than cuddling a sleeping baby, my son, hearing his breathing while he is calmed by my heartbeat. It's so hard late at night when all I want to do is put him to bed so that I can also get some sleep! But too soon these days will be gone. I want to soak up every minute.
I cry less now, and they are happy tears, but I don't expect them to ever disappear. That's motherhood.
8.25.2011
He's here!
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