I can't believe the joy that a baby brings to people--even strangers. Random women at the grocery store go out of their way to sneak a peek of the baby. Invariably, children see Will and excitedly say "Baby!" But it's even more special to see the joy of my parents and my grandma and aunts and cousins when they see Will. They recognize that it's a special thing to be witnessing this new life. And they love him!
And I love the joy Will brings to me and Alex. It's adorable to see him laugh. It always makes us laugh, too--even at Bella's expense as the instance below.... You can't help but be joyful around a baby!
12.29.2011
12.17.2011
Let the Sleep Training Begin!
Will's new thing is that he won't fall asleep at the drop of a hat like he used to. Now he's too aware and wants to play instead of take a nap or go to bed. Luckily, I had read Dr. Weissbluth's book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, and I was totally prepared for this challenge. He recommends right around 4 months getting babies on a sleep schedule. The idea is to notice when they are tired, soothe them to sleep with a consistent routine, and then put them down to sleep. He says they should be getting 2-3 good naps a day (an hour or two) and they should be going to bed between 6-8:00pm.
Armed with this knowledge, I began....
Day 1: I put Will in his crib to nap and he wailed. I gave up. He continued with his normal pattern of sleeping in the Baby Bjorn or the bouncy seat for about 20 minutes before waking up. At bed time, with new resolve and Alex's help, I put Will in his crib after he fell asleep nursing around 7:15. He cried and cried...and cried. Alex went up to the crib to soothe him, then I did. Just as I was about to give up and go get him, he stopped crying and fell asleep. In total he cried about 45 minutes. 45 awful, torturous minutes. Ugh.
That night, Will was up at 2:15am. He has NEVER been up that early before! I was so tired as I was up feeding him, and so frustrated. The book says that babies are supposed to sleep LONGER if they go to bed earlier. What was I doing wrong? I was ready to quit. Try sleep training again later--if at all. Go back to what's easy!!
Day 2: Back to the book. I picked up where I left off yesterday re-reading the chapter on sleep habits for months 5-9. That very page stated that now that babies are going to bed earlier, they will likely wake to be fed around 2-3:00am, then go back to sleep until 6-7:00am. This was exactly what happened with Will. And that was just the encouragement I needed to keep at it.
However, I was still unsuccessful with the morning nap. He actually didn't take one at all. Just cried. And cried. For the afternoon nap, I tried again to soothe him and put him in his crib. After about 30 minutes of crying, he fell asleep and slept for about 25 minutes.
He went to bed around 8:30--later than I'd like but we were out and he had a long nap in the car. No trouble going to sleep. He was up at 4:15, then slept again from 5-8:00am.
Day 3: Breakthrough. I finally had the resolve to try the morning nap and insist on it. I knew Will wa getting overtired because he wasn't getting the hour nap Dr. W. says is crucial to be restorative sleep. I soothed him to sleep again by bouncing him and singing to him. He fell asleep and I was so enjoying cuddling him that I thought about not putting him down at all...but I did. And he cried. Ugh.
I hopped in the shower and prayed. By the time I was done, Will was sound asleep! He slept for an hour and a half. And when he woke up, he had a huge smile on his face. While I changed his diaper and his clothes, he smiled and cooed, even though I knew he was hungry. Hoorah! I consider this a success.
I was worried that having to be home for naps would be frustrating and confining, but I loved my hour and a half of alone time.
For the afternoon nap, I again soothed him when I noticed him getting sleepy and then put him in his crib. He cried for about 2 seconds, I put a pacifier in his mouth and he immediately went to sleep.
36 hours ago I was ready to toss Dr. Weissbluth's book right out the window and I was mentally composing a nasty letter in my head claiming all the reasons why his method is cruel and ineffective. Now, I'm praising his name!
I'm cautious, though, as this was a little too easy. But maybe it's like potty training--when they are ready, they are ready. Only time will tell! For now, I'm going to enjoy my hour of peace!
Armed with this knowledge, I began....
Day 1: I put Will in his crib to nap and he wailed. I gave up. He continued with his normal pattern of sleeping in the Baby Bjorn or the bouncy seat for about 20 minutes before waking up. At bed time, with new resolve and Alex's help, I put Will in his crib after he fell asleep nursing around 7:15. He cried and cried...and cried. Alex went up to the crib to soothe him, then I did. Just as I was about to give up and go get him, he stopped crying and fell asleep. In total he cried about 45 minutes. 45 awful, torturous minutes. Ugh.
That night, Will was up at 2:15am. He has NEVER been up that early before! I was so tired as I was up feeding him, and so frustrated. The book says that babies are supposed to sleep LONGER if they go to bed earlier. What was I doing wrong? I was ready to quit. Try sleep training again later--if at all. Go back to what's easy!!
Day 2: Back to the book. I picked up where I left off yesterday re-reading the chapter on sleep habits for months 5-9. That very page stated that now that babies are going to bed earlier, they will likely wake to be fed around 2-3:00am, then go back to sleep until 6-7:00am. This was exactly what happened with Will. And that was just the encouragement I needed to keep at it.
However, I was still unsuccessful with the morning nap. He actually didn't take one at all. Just cried. And cried. For the afternoon nap, I tried again to soothe him and put him in his crib. After about 30 minutes of crying, he fell asleep and slept for about 25 minutes.
He went to bed around 8:30--later than I'd like but we were out and he had a long nap in the car. No trouble going to sleep. He was up at 4:15, then slept again from 5-8:00am.
Day 3: Breakthrough. I finally had the resolve to try the morning nap and insist on it. I knew Will wa getting overtired because he wasn't getting the hour nap Dr. W. says is crucial to be restorative sleep. I soothed him to sleep again by bouncing him and singing to him. He fell asleep and I was so enjoying cuddling him that I thought about not putting him down at all...but I did. And he cried. Ugh.
I hopped in the shower and prayed. By the time I was done, Will was sound asleep! He slept for an hour and a half. And when he woke up, he had a huge smile on his face. While I changed his diaper and his clothes, he smiled and cooed, even though I knew he was hungry. Hoorah! I consider this a success.
I was worried that having to be home for naps would be frustrating and confining, but I loved my hour and a half of alone time.
For the afternoon nap, I again soothed him when I noticed him getting sleepy and then put him in his crib. He cried for about 2 seconds, I put a pacifier in his mouth and he immediately went to sleep.
36 hours ago I was ready to toss Dr. Weissbluth's book right out the window and I was mentally composing a nasty letter in my head claiming all the reasons why his method is cruel and ineffective. Now, I'm praising his name!
I'm cautious, though, as this was a little too easy. But maybe it's like potty training--when they are ready, they are ready. Only time will tell! For now, I'm going to enjoy my hour of peace!
12.16.2011
Four Months
The time is truly flying by. As I've heard it said, with a baby, the days are long, but the years are short. There have been some long days, but the time is flying by.
At four months now, Will is very active and alert. He wants to play all the time. He can pick up toys from the floor or from a tray and put them right into his mouth. He loves to chew on things--that with the intense drool is a sure sign teething is just around the corner! He is very active, always kicking or hitting things, and he's testing his own strength, stretching out on the changing table and standing up when we hold him. He's found his feet now! He has even discovered that he can kick his feet in the bathtub and make noisy waves.
He has noticed and come to love Bella. He sees her and smiles. He tries to touch her and sometimes grabs her (I'm sure the grabbing will be an issue down the road here!). And she can make him laugh like crazy when she pulls at a toy or sniffs his chin. And Bella is a good big sister, totally cool with a little boy kicking her while he nurses and she nuzzles up next to me.
Will still loves music and now he also loves dancing. I will carry him around and sing and dance with him, moving his arms and wiggling him to the beat of the music. He gets the biggest smile on his face and he laughs. Even if he's a little cranky, there's nothing a good little dance won't fix.
Nothing makes him smile or laugh like Alex does. When he walks in the room, Will's face lights up. When he spots him at the kitchen table, he smiles. Alex only has to make some weird noise and Will starts to laugh and laugh. It's the cutest thing.
We're still working on tummy time....slowly progressing. Propped up on a pillow he's much more tolerant. And sleeping is now becoming a bit of an issue. He doesn't go down as effortlessly or sleep quite as long as he used to. But that's all material for another post.
I can truly say that I've enjoyed (almost) every minute of these first 4 months and I know it won't be long until I'm reflecting on month #5!
At four months now, Will is very active and alert. He wants to play all the time. He can pick up toys from the floor or from a tray and put them right into his mouth. He loves to chew on things--that with the intense drool is a sure sign teething is just around the corner! He is very active, always kicking or hitting things, and he's testing his own strength, stretching out on the changing table and standing up when we hold him. He's found his feet now! He has even discovered that he can kick his feet in the bathtub and make noisy waves.
He has noticed and come to love Bella. He sees her and smiles. He tries to touch her and sometimes grabs her (I'm sure the grabbing will be an issue down the road here!). And she can make him laugh like crazy when she pulls at a toy or sniffs his chin. And Bella is a good big sister, totally cool with a little boy kicking her while he nurses and she nuzzles up next to me.
Will still loves music and now he also loves dancing. I will carry him around and sing and dance with him, moving his arms and wiggling him to the beat of the music. He gets the biggest smile on his face and he laughs. Even if he's a little cranky, there's nothing a good little dance won't fix.
Nothing makes him smile or laugh like Alex does. When he walks in the room, Will's face lights up. When he spots him at the kitchen table, he smiles. Alex only has to make some weird noise and Will starts to laugh and laugh. It's the cutest thing.
We're still working on tummy time....slowly progressing. Propped up on a pillow he's much more tolerant. And sleeping is now becoming a bit of an issue. He doesn't go down as effortlessly or sleep quite as long as he used to. But that's all material for another post.
I can truly say that I've enjoyed (almost) every minute of these first 4 months and I know it won't be long until I'm reflecting on month #5!
12.15.2011
Christmas Through a Mother's Eyes
I've seen it a hundred times: the nativity scene with Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus lying in the manger. This year, I look at that scene very differently. I can empathize with Mary's pain that night. I can hear Joseph's panic. I can imagine them trying to clean and make comfortable this newborn baby. "No crying he makes?" Yeah, right!
And I can picture God in heaven observing the scene. I can imagine the bittersweet smile on his face. His Son has been born...to die. Oh, the joy of life--Jesus, fully God and fully man. But oh, the sadness and the pain of knowing this precious, innocent baby's fate. The love of God to send his Son willingly to this earth, willingly to the cross, astounds me. The love I feel for my son is nothing compared to the love of the Father for his. I can imagine it. And the driving force behind his decision is an intense love for all of his people.
I cannot imagine anything happening to Will, especially an early, undeserved, brutal death. I cannot imagine how God could send his Son for that purpose. As much as I think I know what love is, God's love I cannot grasp. That is the glory of Christmas.
And I can picture God in heaven observing the scene. I can imagine the bittersweet smile on his face. His Son has been born...to die. Oh, the joy of life--Jesus, fully God and fully man. But oh, the sadness and the pain of knowing this precious, innocent baby's fate. The love of God to send his Son willingly to this earth, willingly to the cross, astounds me. The love I feel for my son is nothing compared to the love of the Father for his. I can imagine it. And the driving force behind his decision is an intense love for all of his people.
I cannot imagine anything happening to Will, especially an early, undeserved, brutal death. I cannot imagine how God could send his Son for that purpose. As much as I think I know what love is, God's love I cannot grasp. That is the glory of Christmas.
12.11.2011
Will and His Daddy
There is nothing better than seeing Will and Alex together. When Alex walks in the room, Will gets a huge smile on his face. Alex plays with him and can always make him laugh. It makes me fall in love with Alex all over again.
12.10.2011
Life is Sweet
"That it shall never come again is what makes life so sweet."
Emily Dickinson
I have made this my new screensaver.
On those nights when Will is inconsolable, and those times when I want to just have a minute to myself and he won't let me put him down, and those reheated dinners I eat because I had to nurse while Alex ate, and those 3am wake-up calls when all I really want to do is sleep in...at those times, I remember that these days will never come again and therefore, even in those times, life is sweet.
And on mornings when Will nuzzles in my shoulder, and those times when he lets out the most adorable baby laugh, and those times on the changing table that he smiles and "talks" to me with a wild range of pitch, and those moments when he wraps his tiny little hand around my finger...at those times, I remember that this moment will never come again and therefore, I savor it, soak it up, recognize its uniqueness and think to myself that life is so sweet.
Emily Dickinson
I have made this my new screensaver.
On those nights when Will is inconsolable, and those times when I want to just have a minute to myself and he won't let me put him down, and those reheated dinners I eat because I had to nurse while Alex ate, and those 3am wake-up calls when all I really want to do is sleep in...at those times, I remember that these days will never come again and therefore, even in those times, life is sweet.
And on mornings when Will nuzzles in my shoulder, and those times when he lets out the most adorable baby laugh, and those times on the changing table that he smiles and "talks" to me with a wild range of pitch, and those moments when he wraps his tiny little hand around my finger...at those times, I remember that this moment will never come again and therefore, I savor it, soak it up, recognize its uniqueness and think to myself that life is so sweet.
12.08.2011
Scary
I took Will to the Pediatric Dermatologist this week. He has a birthmark on his scalp that needs to be removed. This will involve surgery using general anesthesia and should be taken care of in February or March of 2012.
The doctor called the spot a "nevus sebaceus" and I've been researching it online. There doesn't seem to be too much known information about the cause or effects of these things. They are somehow related to hormonal and genetic causes. They can become cancerous in adolescence and can be a sign of a neurological or skeletal disorder (though my doctor didn't mention these possibilities).
This is scary stuff. Scary to think of the surgery, scary to think of the anesthesia, scary to think of future consequences. It's a test of my promise to trust Will to God.
I often sing to him the old hymn "Take My Life and Let It Be." I've started changing the words to one verse, singing instead: "Take my Will and make him thine. He shall be no longer mine." It's hard to surrender, but that song makes it a conscious act on my part. God is in control.
The doctor called the spot a "nevus sebaceus" and I've been researching it online. There doesn't seem to be too much known information about the cause or effects of these things. They are somehow related to hormonal and genetic causes. They can become cancerous in adolescence and can be a sign of a neurological or skeletal disorder (though my doctor didn't mention these possibilities).
This is scary stuff. Scary to think of the surgery, scary to think of the anesthesia, scary to think of future consequences. It's a test of my promise to trust Will to God.
I often sing to him the old hymn "Take My Life and Let It Be." I've started changing the words to one verse, singing instead: "Take my Will and make him thine. He shall be no longer mine." It's hard to surrender, but that song makes it a conscious act on my part. God is in control.
12.07.2011
Lonely
Now that the novelty of a new baby has worn off, and we're entering winter, AND a couple of my mom friends have started back to work, I'm finding this job to sometimes be lonely. Will isn't super interactive, and even though I love spending time with him, I do sometimes miss being around other adults. I am an introvert, so I don't mind spending time alone. In fact, I relish it! But I have to be intentional about getting together with people, getting involved in things, and getting out of the house. It's not motivating when it's 30 degrees outside...but it's good for my soul.
12.01.2011
What You Need...and What You Don't (First 3 months)
I think the hardest thing was making a registry and figuring out all the things I would need for a baby. Everyone will tell you something different, but here's my stab at it!
First, you need all the nitty-gritty practical healthcare stuff...the lotions, the diapers, the wipes. See my post on Preparation. Then, you need a copy of Baby Bargains by Denise and Alan Fields. This is a great resource that outlines pros and cons of different name brands for nearly every piece of baby equipment you can imagine!
Additional things you'll NEED:
Stuff you'll probably want:
First, you need all the nitty-gritty practical healthcare stuff...the lotions, the diapers, the wipes. See my post on Preparation. Then, you need a copy of Baby Bargains by Denise and Alan Fields. This is a great resource that outlines pros and cons of different name brands for nearly every piece of baby equipment you can imagine!
Additional things you'll NEED:
- Carseat
- Stroller (preferably one that holds the newborn carseat)
- Crib (make sure sides are not moveable)
- Crib mattress
- 2 crib sheets
- Changing pad of some type
- 2 changing pad covers
- Baby hairbrush
- Baby Tylenol
- Baby nail clippers
- Thermometer
- Swing/Bouncy seat--somewhere to set baby down to sleep or play
- Swaddle blankets (at least 2-3)
- 4-5 newborn size sleep-and-play outifts (try to get ones with mitten cuffs!)
- 3 newborn-size long-sleeve onesies or t-shirts
- 4 3-month-size sleep-and-play outfits
- 8-10 3-month-size outfits
- 3-6 3-month-size long-sleeve onesies
- 6 pairs of socks--I like GAP socks and Gymboree socks the best
- Diaper bag
- 5-7 bottles, even if you're breastfeeding
- Formula (nice to have an emergency stash even if you're breastfeeding)
- Distilled water for formula
- Teethers
- 12 Burp cloths
- 6 bibs
- Baby hooded towel and 3 washcloths
- Nursing pads, nursing bra
- Pacifiers, hat, ball syringe you'll get at the hospital!
Stuff you'll probably want:
- Small sleep sack and/or SwaddleMe
- Bassinet
- Rocking chair for baby's room
- Light-blocking window shades
- CD player or sound machine
- Diaper pail
- Mobile for crib
- Crib skirt
- Nursery decorations
- Baby monitor
- Dimmer switch on the light in baby's room
- Humidifier
- Baby medicine dispensing pacifier
- Baby bathtub
- Pack-N-Play
- Swing AND Bouncy seat (different babies like one or the other better...or like my baby, they have preferences on different days)
- Play gym with a few toys
- Boardbooks
- Variety of pacifier brands to see what works for your baby
- pacifier wipes
- A few additional outfits
- Dreft laundry detergent or some other dye-free and perfume-free brand
- Oxiclean Baby and Oxiclean Baby spray stain remover
- Laundry basket
- Breast pump (if you're breastfeeding)
- Breastmilk storage bags
- nursing wrap
- baby carrier (Baby Bjorn, Ergo, Moby wrap)
- Bumbo seat
- Camera/video camera
- Carseat cover for cold weather
- Additional strollers (I was glad I had a stroller frame to fit the baby carrier in addition to the travel system stroller for walks)
- Boppy pillow
- File for receipts and manuals for baby equipment
- Teething gel
- Breathable crib bumper
- I had a bouncy seat on each level of my house so I had a place to put Will when I was showering upstairs, or working out in the basement.
- A jogging stroller
- Video monitor
- Boogie Wipes
- Itzbeen timer
- Play try for Bumbo seat
- A second play gym to keep in the car--easy entertainment when you visit a non-kid-inhabited space
- Bottle Warmer
- Too many clothes--you'll be doing a lot of laundry anyway!
- A traditional crib set (bumper, quilt, etc.)
- Mittens (they never stay on anyway)
- Bumbo seat cover
- Dreft--any perfume-free, dye-free detergent will work
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